A Tired Woman and Universe by Jolita Kelias

“Why do you talk in between the lines with me? Do you really think I don’t understand? Do you really think I am so naive and powerless to read your mind? I can read, I can understand but yet it does not mean I will respond. You want my response, then dare to be straight and honest with me, with yourself,” Universe spoke.

A tired woman sat silently curled up in the corner. Her mind went blank. She suddenly felt so drained and exhausted. She used to think she can argue every single bit of life, but how can you argue with the universe that is all and everything? How can you argue the truth with the truth itself?

“I was taught to pretend that I want nothing, and in order for me to get something, I was taught to go around hoping that others will understand what there was that I wanted,” the woman tried to voice her thoughts.

“And so how is that going on with you, my dear?” Universe laughed.

This hurt her feelings. She is tired, she is exhausted, and Universe is laughing at her.

“Why do you laugh at me? You created me, so get me out of this mess,” the woman demanded.

“I certainly did make an impute into your existence, but the rest you did yourself.”

“I don’t understand...”

“You always have a choice in life, so you make one...and you make those choices every day, every single moment of your existence, even if you think that the only one responsible for everything is me – your creator.”

“So if you are not responsible for my life, then who is?” the woman seemed to be confused.

Universe kept quiet.

“Who is?!” this time she raised her tone in desperation. “Who the heck is then?!”

“You.”

“Me?”

“That’s right. You. Simple, isn’t it? Now you see, there is no one to blame, no one to point at, no one to keep accountable for your mistakes, unless you are willing to blame yourself, as if you haven’t done it enough already.”

“If that’s how it is, then where does my transformation begin?” the woman wondered. “I am so tired of looking for the answers. It feels as if I am getting nowhere in life.”

“You are moving forward, it just not to the direction you wished for,” Universe answered.

“No, this is not what I asked for,” she argued.

“Oh, really?!”

“Yes. I asked for success, for love, for richness, for happiness...”

“Ok...ok...stop there. Just stop,” Universe commanded.

The woman obeyed.

“Do you remember how you asked for it, how you kept changing your mind over and over again, how you tried to negotiate with yourself the terms and conditions and then how the following morning you denied it all, as you did not wish to seem too greedy? Greedy?! In front of whom?” Universe was thundering. “Do you remember, how many days and nights you spent negotiating your choices? Do you remember those dialogues you kept having in your head on and on?”

Woman’s eyes closed, she lowered her head and tears started pouring down her cheeks.

“Do you remember, woman? Do you?!”

“Yes, I do,” she answered quietly.

“It is not too late. You are tired of yourself. Let go, woman, of your history, of your past. Let go! Open your hands, your heart, your mind. Decide who you are and be it. No need to feel ashamed. Go and live, you have so little time...”

She began weeping uncontrollably. “But how?” she begged for the answer.

“You want something from me, come and ask me straight and honestly. Don’t expect me to read between the lines. I might read and understand but yet I won’t respond. You want happiness, then ask me for happiness, show me how you understand happiness and I shall do the rest. You want love, tell me about it in all honesty, show me how you see it and I will bring all the forces of life for it to manifest in your life. You want success, claim it, tell me about it directly, show me how you understand it and I, your creator, will go to the end of the world to bring it all for you. You asked me to answer to your questions today, so I am here doing it right now. Do you hear me? Can you hear me? Do you want to hear me? Speak to me directly, open your heart, don’t be afraid to be vulnerable, be honest, and I shall respond accordingly. I love you. I love you so much. I make myself vulnerable each time I tell you how much I love you and yet my strength lies in my vulnerability. I want what you want for yourself. Ask me. Tell me. Show me. And have faith in me.”

~Jolita Kelias

Copyright © Jolita Kelias, Feb 2011

All Rights Reserved