HELPERS FROM ABROAD

“Dreams are illustrations from the book your soul is writing about you.”
Marsha Norman

Since my early childhood I always wanted to learn English language. I imagined myself speaking and writing fluently and being able to communicate with others effortlessly. However, at that time I did not consider the length of journey I would have to take to accomplish my dream.

I found it truly challenging to learn English language at school. During lessons whenever I tried to speak or say something in English, classmates would laugh and make fun of me. They did the same with others and encountered the same attitude towards themselves as well. It was like a vicious circle I could not get out of. Also often the English language teacher would speak in Lithuanian because others could not understand a word she said. My English teachers were good teachers, just, unfortunately, surrounded by a majority of sluggish and ignorant bunch of pupils. The ones who truly wanted to improve their English language skills found it very hard because of distractions and noise coming from their fellow classmates. For that simple reason I disliked attending English lessons for I did not feel as if I was getting anywhere anyway.

There were children at school, whose parents could afford private English lessons and so their skills improved constantly, whereas my sister and I could not have that opportunity due to our poor financial circumstance. But that did not discourage me nor my sister, instead it pushed us to become more determined and creative when pursuing our dream.

One bright beautiful day in early spring my dear sister Diana came up with a very good idea. She suggested finding people from abroad with whom we could become pen pals. We felt it was the best way for us to make friends and also to improve our English skills. I felt very excited and overjoyed. My sister went to the library and searched through the newspapers she could find there looking for possible contacts. At that time we did not use computers yet and we knew little about the internet. So she found a few contacts on special pages created for people who wanted to expand their friends’ list and learn more about other countries, other people, their culture, traditions and, of course, improve English skills. She immediately showed it to me. I could not believe it was that easy. We decided to write our first letters to our new friends abroad. They were all between 14 to 18 years old.

It took us the whole day to write our first letter in English. We were incredibly enthusiastic and thrilled with our new venture. Later we rewrote the same letters to others as well making sure we put correct names. I contacted my new friends in four different countries: Mexico, Japan, Morocco and Ghana. To my great surprise within a month I received letters from all of them expressing their interest in making friends with me, and so our communication began.

It was very challenging for me trying to express my thoughts and opinion in a foreign language, especially when I had so little knowledge and experience, but I was happy. Nothing could discourage me. I armed myself with patience, perseverance, dictionary and various English language books which taught how to write sentences correctly, explained the complexity of grammar and gave plenty of various examples, which I used for my letters.

At the beginning it used to take me the whole day to write just one letter. I studied with patience and pure dedication. I had lots of fun with it. I enjoyed every minute of it. My sister joined my side as well and we helped each other to read the letters we received from abroad, to translate them and to answer as well as we could at that given moment. Very quickly that became our hobby. Whatever I learned new I immediately shared with my sister and whatever she learned or understood new, she shared with me. That way we grew and learned together. After a few months I was able to write longer letters in a shorter period of time and to express myself more fluently. Nonetheless, my speaking skills were very poor. Already then I knew I needed to go abroad, where I could practice English on a daily basis.

I was eighteen years old when I finally completed a twelve year program at secondary school. The same year I entered college in the capital Vilnius, where I studied tourism and hotel administration management. English became compulsory then and I had to attend four to five classes a week and sometimes even more. My writing was better than my speaking. My English teacher spoke only in English with her students. It was very challenging for me, as I could hardly understand her. She lacked patience especially for students with weak English language skills. However, I did not blame her for that. My poor English skills were my own responsibility, and her duty was to make sure I pass the entire program successfully. She pushed me to study hard, she expected me to complete various homework tasks and to learn to speak well. I was shy; everything was totally different to me. It took me some time to get used to a new teacher and her ways of tutoring. I tried my best. I studied as much as I could, I showed interest in speaking and communicating with my teacher that way also hoping to improve my pronunciation and I did my homework by myself without anyone’s help. Even so, I did not seem to succeed. One day I reached a point, where I actually was scared to attend her classes and sometimes I intentionally missed them. English was still a tough nut for me to crack; but even then, I still kept in regular contact with my pen pals abroad and exchanged letters via post with them on a monthly basis. That helped me to keep my hopes up and to progress further no matter how slow and painful that was.

Sadly, after three years of college I was still far away from speaking English fluently. I felt very bad about myself. I became even more desperate to learn this language. I could not allow myself to quit or give up. I knew that in order for me to learn it, I needed to feel it as if it was mine, and the only thing that was left for me to do was to pack my stuff and go abroad.

Six months after graduating from Vilnius College just before Christmas I packed my little suitcase and went abroad. I was planning to travel for a year, hoping it would be enough for me to experience a breakthrough, and then return home with my dream fulfilled. While travelling I encountered all kinds of people. At the beginning it was very challenging for me to understand them or to express my thoughts. However, soon my shyness began to disappear and I finally began to speak one word, one sentence at the time. By then I was able to express my thoughts much better and have easy conversations, but yet I did not feel the language. It felt as if I was banging my head against the wall.

Then one day after a year of intensive travelling around Europe I landed in my dream city London in United Kingdom. That very moment I knew my life had changed for good. I felt a magical connection to the land, to it’s people and the language itself. My English skills began to improve rapidly. My work colleagues and managers helped me a lot as well. I encouraged them to correct me whenever I pronounced a word wrongly or said something that made no sense whatsoever, which actually happened pretty often.

Fortunately, to this day I keep in touch with one of my pen pals from abroad, but this time we stay in contact with the help of internet and emails. I feel as if we grew up and matured together. Fourteen years passed since. Throughout the years we learned a lot about each other and created a history between us as distant, but true friends. Many things have changed since I wrote my first letter in English to my friends abroad. Now I can write with ease or simply give a call and have a lovely chat without any difficulty.

Days, weeks, months and years passed. Within time I reached the point, where I could sit in front of my computer and pour my thoughts out without the help of a dictionary or have proper discussions with others in fluent English whenever I wanted, no matter what the subject. To be frank, I still have difficulties pronouncing certain words or expressing myself in the best way possible and I am not sure if I will ever be able to speak and write and express myself as well as English people, but I am fine with that. English language has become a big part of me and my daily life. At long last, I can feel this language and to me it is already mine.


~Jolita Kelias

Copyright © Jolita Kelias, August 2011
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